How good are you in english?

Anyway, please review this article:

http://www.geocities.com/friend_al_23/D ... mfhla.html

 

Heehee, nice article... just another one of your dreams? It had a few mistakes, but those were typos I think.

 

Well, u have a witness now.. heh..
Could u introduce me to ur uhm.. pillow... haha :smile:

and Al, ur link is broken again..

 

While I think most of us have one with a hand from time to time... I've never done it with a pillow...honestly. :grin:

The article is written nicely though... you must have felt really inspired. If you'd go to a counseling place in US and tell them about that, they'd say it's normal for boys to have those things. And for pillows too.

Here's a quote for you Al:

"I am cheap, but my silence is not" :smile:

 

I didn't write that. I'm to review it and I think there's something wrong with the article. Anyway, I too don't know wrote that. It was given to me by Mr. Editor-In-Chief.

What are those typos? What are your comments?

 

That's ok Al, we know you wrote that, and that is ok. We are your friends, we understand.

EDIT: Err I forgot about the mistakes... here they go:

keep in mind that I'm not really an expert, just pointing out what I think is wrong and trying to help... I won't look into punctuation because I'm not good with it myself... and it doesn't matter as much.

"cold, story night," - What's that? Story night? Starry maybe???

"eyes distanced" - I don't think you could say that... anyone care to elaborate?

"cream gown" - If it is describing the color of the gown I think it should be creamy.

"a scold sweat " - I think the author (whoever he is ) meant cold sweat...also I dont think you can say a sweat... "cold sweat was trickling" would be the correct way to say that, I think.

"sough her out" - doesn't make sense according to the definitions of 'sough' I found in the http://www.dictionary.com Maybe sought would fit better?

"reflecting on her smooth ivory skin" - I think it would reflecting off her smooth ivory skin... or something along the lines of "falling on her smooth ivory skin and reflecing bla bla bla"

"pouting lips" - pouting is kinda like sticking out... so she was stickin her lips out eh? sounds good, but mostly if not always pouting is used to show displeasure.

Well at this point i get bored...and if u really need the rest, I can do it tomorow, but I'm not a very good proof reader as english is my second language, and also not my first choice of a language. :smile: Overall there seems to be a ton of run-ons, but fuck them.

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Ioo on 2001-11-14 04:37 ]</font>

 

As I haven't read it yet, and because I probably won't, the only conclusion open to me is that it is pretty bad...

 

No it's good, as I said there... It's nothing without that puncline about the pillow in the end though. :smile:

 

I dunno, i think whoever wrote it was a nut job with a blow-up doll.

 

WAS a nut job with a blow-up doll??? Aside from that terrible error, this is the worst post I've seen so far... dang idiot.

 

giving it a honest review, out of 10 i would give it a 3 for the fact that it's not very funny or erotic which i am assuming was the intention of the author

 

Thanks guys for the input. The other board won't even reply to it. :sad: I guess it was really that bad.

 

what other board?

 

Game Banshee.

 

I dun really see how you would rate that article since reading it hardly takes any time... so if it's good or bad you don't lose anything.

If you want erotic articles, there are plenty out there man!

 

That's because I didn't wrote it.

Do you know any sites that helps with the English grammar? How do you use have/has/had? Is starting with an action verb e.g. "Presenting the platform of government..." correct? What's passive / active verbs? Are they good because I always get this green marked whenever I type at MSWord.